It can be very difficult after the break up of a relationship, the hurt that you and your partner feel towards each other
can very easily end up hurting your child for years to come, if it is not handled well. It seems that the best advice that
anyone can give is that no matter how often or how hard it is stay involved in the child’s life as much as you
can after separation and divorce.
It is a fact that fewer than 15 percent of fathers receive shared or joint custody of their children after divorce, and
too many of those who don't get custody end up slowly fading out of their children's lives.
But even after divorce, there are a lot of ways in which dads can continue to play an active role. The most critical is
to stay in touch in person, by phone, by text, by e-mail, or by regular mail. And make the time you spend with your
kids meaningful, don't just go to Mc Donald's, sorry a fast food outlet every week. You are building memories with your
child so try to be more imaginative, go to the zoo, the park, kick a football, take them for a walk in the woods, go to the
seaside or even just play with them in the house make a fort or a cave with an old sheet it doesn't have to cost anything
but it does need your time.
Try not to spoil your child excessively to make up for your absence it will backfire in the end. It is important to
avoid settling old arguments by using your children as pawns.
Separation or divorce is very hard on a child and they can be torn between two parents that they love equally, so
it is up to you and your ex partner to find a way to make the transition as pain free as possible for the child. It
is a good idea to sit down with your child and explain exactly what the seperation or divorce is going to mean to them,
explain exactly how it will effect their lives in every way, (tip : establishing a routine often helps the children to
settle down quickly and adjust to the new situation).
Parents need to cooperate and support each other for the sake of the children, easier said than done we know this is hard
after the deterioration of a relationship, but it is very important for the happiness of your child so, if at first you don’t
succeed try try again (a oldie but a goodie).
If you have an experience of what it is like to be a weekend Dad please share it with us at TLM
